Jokesss!!!

 

1. What color is a burp?
- Burple
2. Why did Tigger look inside the toilet?
- Because he was looking for Pooh.
3. How do you say for ABC-s backwards?
- CBA
4. Why was the math book crying?
- Because it had too many problems!
5. Why cant a bicycle stand up?
- Because its two tired.
6. Why did the bacon laugh?
- Because the egg cracked a yolk.
7. Why did the man freeze his money?
- He wanted cold, hard cash.
8. When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
- In the dictionary.
9. Why did the Pilgrims pants always fall down?
- Because they wore their belt buckle on their hat.
10. What kind of dance do you do on a trampoline?
- Hip-hop
11. Why didn’t anyone want to sleep with daddy dinosaur?
- Because he was a Bronto-snore-us
12. Where do horses live?
- in neigh-borhoods!
13. What’s black and white and red all over?
- A zebra with a rash!
14. What did the rabbit give his girlfriend?
- A 14 carrot ring!
15. What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor?
- A knight light!
16. Why did the turkey cross the road?
- To prove he wasn’t chicken!
17. What did the mountain climber name his son?
- Cliff!
18. What is a dog’s favorite movie?
- The Wizard of Paws!
19. What is Tarzan’s favorite Christmas carol?
- Jungle Bells!
20. Why did the peanut cross the road?
- To get to the Shell station.
21. Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
- In the piano!
22. What did one virus say to the other?
- “Stay away, i think i’ve got penicillin!”
23. When’s a good time to go to the dentist?
- At tooth-thirty!
24. Which side of a bird has the most feathers?
- The outside!
25. Why can’t you play cards in the jungle?
- Because there are too many cheetahs around!
26. Why are cats terrible story tellers?
- Because they have only one tail!
27. Why are boggers difficult diners?
- Because they’re so picky!
28. What type of nut has a hole?
- A doughnut!
29. What is a cow’s favorite school activity?
- Moo-sic!
30. How do you make the number one disappear?
- Add a “g” to it and its “gone” !
31. Why did Mozart sell his chickens?
- Because they wouldn’t stop saying, “Bach, Bach!”
32. How do you make a strawberry shake?
- Take it to a scary movie!
33. How do you sink a submarine?
- Send a diver to knock on the back door!
34. What happened to the frog when it broke down?
- it got toad away!
35. Why was it so hot after the baseball game?
- because all the fans left!
36. What do you call a piece of wood with nothing to do?
- Bored!
37. What does a snowman eat for breakfast?
- Frosted flakes!
38. Why was the boy staring at the orang juice?
- Because it said consentrate!
39. What kind of car do electricians drive?
- Volts-wagens!
40. Why did the skeleton go to the grocery store?
- To get some spare ribs!
41. What do you call a lizard that sings?
- A rap-tile!
42. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
- He was feeling crumb-y!
43. Why did the guy remove his doorbell?
- To win a no-bell prize!
44. What do witches put in their hair?
- Scare spray!
45. What’s a cat’s favorite color?
- Purr-ple!
46. What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?
- Hot cross bunnies!
47. What’s a pirate’s favorite restaurant?
- Arrr-by’s!
48. Where do bees go after they get married?
- On their honey-moon!
49. What do you get when you cross a centipede and a parrot?
- A walkie talkie!
50. What do farmers use to count their cows?
- A cow-culator!

1. What color is a burp?

- Burple

2. Why did Tigger look inside the toilet?

- Because he was looking for Pooh.

3. How do you say for ABC-s backwards?

- CBA

4. Why was the math book crying?

- Because it had too many problems!

5. Why cant a bicycle stand up?

- Because its two tired.

6. Why did the bacon laugh?

- Because the egg cracked a yolk.

7. Why did the man freeze his money?

- He wanted cold, hard cash.

8. When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?

- In the dictionary.

9. Why did the Pilgrims pants always fall down?

- Because they wore their belt buckle on their hat.

10. What kind of dance do you do on a trampoline?

- Hip-hop

11. Why didn’t anyone want to sleep with daddy dinosaur?

- Because he was a Bronto-snore-us

12. Where do horses live?

- in neigh-borhoods!

13. What’s black and white and red all over?

- A zebra with a rash!

14. What did the rabbit give his girlfriend?

- A 14 carrot ring!

15. What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor?

- A knight light!

16. Why did the turkey cross the road?

- To prove he wasn’t chicken!

17. What did the mountain climber name his son?

- Cliff!

18. What is a dog’s favorite movie?

- The Wizard of Paws!

19. What is Tarzan’s favorite Christmas carol?

- Jungle Bells!

20. Why did the peanut cross the road?

- To get to the Shell station.

21. Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

- In the piano!

22. What did one virus say to the other?

- “Stay away, i think i’ve got penicillin!”

23. When’s a good time to go to the dentist?

- At tooth-thirty!

24. Which side of a bird has the most feathers?

- The outside!

25. Why can’t you play cards in the jungle?

- Because there are too many cheetahs around!

26. Why are cats terrible story tellers?

- Because they have only one tail!

27. Why are boggers difficult diners?

- Because they’re so picky!

28. What type of nut has a hole?

- A doughnut!

29. What is a cow’s favorite school activity?

- Moo-sic!

30. How do you make the number one disappear?

- Add a “g” to it and its “gone” !

31. Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

- Because they wouldn’t stop saying, “Bach, Bach!”

32. How do you make a strawberry shake?

- Take it to a scary movie!

33. How do you sink a submarine?

- Send a diver to knock on the back door!

34. What happened to the frog when it broke down?

- it got toad away!

35. Why was it so hot after the baseball game?

- because all the fans left!

36. What do you call a piece of wood with nothing to do?

- Bored!

37. What does a snowman eat for breakfast?

- Frosted flakes!

38. Why was the boy staring at the orang juice?

- Because it said consentrate!

39. What kind of car do electricians drive?

- Volts-wagens!

40. Why did the skeleton go to the grocery store?

- To get some spare ribs!

41. What do you call a lizard that sings?

- A rap-tile!

42. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

- He was feeling crumb-y!

43. Why did the guy remove his doorbell?

- To win a no-bell prize!

44. What do witches put in their hair?

- Scare spray!

45. What’s a cat’s favorite color?

- Purr-ple!

46. What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?

- Hot cross bunnies!

47. What’s a pirate’s favorite restaurant?

- Arrr-by’s!

48. Where do bees go after they get married?

- On their honey-moon!

49. What do you get when you cross a centipede and a parrot?

- A walkie talkie!

50. What do farmers use to count their cows?

- A cow-culator!

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Posted in Jokes. 2 Comments »

2 Responses to “Jokesss!!!”

  1. wend1808 Says:

    Wew..
    I think these jokes are quite funny!! lol

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